Since everyone loves a fresh new baby, Eva has been getting most of the attention for the past month. Guests go straight to Eva when they visit. Liam has to wait for a drink of milk or cereal bar until after I change and feed Eva. Evenings are spent trying to comfort Eva during her witching hour while Liam entertains himself. My biggest worry when we had Eva was how Liam would adjust to the new family dynamic. While I have heard and agree that when you have a second child, your love doubles, the attention aspect still remains divided. So, Liam, here's to you!
You are my first born. You are the one who made me a mama. You are my only son. As a two year old, you have boundless energy and your Great Grandpa Jerry's smile. Everyday you make me laugh and everyday you surprise me with what you have learned. You can count to ten, name colors, and know a handful of letters. But, more important than that, you are sweet, humorous, and helpful. My love for you continues to grow each day and I love seeing you in the big brother roll.
You will always be my baby boy, but something changed when we had your sister, Eva. When we brought Eva home, I no longer saw you as a baby. Granted, you were no longer a baby for quite a while, but I saw you in a new light. You are a toddler on the brink of becoming a preschooler and it wasn't until we had Eva that I really accepted that. You still need cuddles, to be tucked in at night, and your diaper changed, but you are also putting away your own dishes, cleaning up your own messes, and putting on your own shoes. Although you will always be my baby boy, you are no longer the baby in the family. Part of me felt heartbroken, but the other part of me beamed with pride. You are such a good big brother and are becoming quite the little man.
Know that mama feels just as bad as you do when I can't tend to your needs right away because your little sister needs attention. I realize that you are frustrated, but I also realize that it will teach you patience. Know that just because I am paying attention to Eva doesn't mean I love you any less. If anything I love you more now that Eva's here because I've gotten to see what a great big brother you are. Know that I feel guilty about the times where the TV is on most the day and dinner is less than spectacular because we are in straight survival mode. Someday you will become a parent and realize that not every single moment can be filled with magical childhood memories and that having children can be straight up exhausting. Know that I look forward to our one on one dates more than ever now. I so much appreciate the time we get to spend together, just us. Know that however our family dynamic may change across time, you will always be loved and that love will continue to grow.
Love,
Mama
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